Why mindset matters most

Why Mindset Matters Most

Mindset matters most because it drives our outcomes:

Mindset >> beliefs >> behaviors >> outcomes

Here’s what I mean:

Your mindset is that making money by having fun is impossible. You think it so much you start believing it. You believe it to the point you don’t learn to turn fun into cash. And so, …

You don’t make money by having fun.

But here’s where the rubber really meets the road:

Mindset >> meaning >> emotions >> “emissions”

Here’s what I mean:

Life happens. We get to choose how to think about it. And it’s smart to think in the best-feeling ways we can if enjoying life is the plan. Plus, bad-feeling emotions can thwart our best efforts.

Emotions = Energy we feel that becomes energy we emit.

Have you ever met someone who said the right things but repelled you with their vibe? Master your emotions and don’t be that guy. And do you expect Rick James from a jazz station? No, but we do from life: put out funk and expect Blue Skies.

We reap what we sow in word, deed, and energy.
Sooo…if you want to rock ‘n’ roll, stop singing the blues and soften up.

Years ago, I asked a friend to go to a meeting with me.

I stood him up. He got angry. He found me the next day to chew me out.

Looking at this through my friend’s eyes, you might take his side.

Now let’s look at the story through mine:

I asked a friend to go to a meeting with me.

The day before the meeting, my brother was killed in an accident.

I was skipping the meeting and sent my friend a message saying so. He didn’t get it.

When he came to chew me out, I apologized and explained; immediately, his anger became sympathy.

I’m telling this story to make five points:

  1. Give people who upset you the benefit of the doubt, especially family and friends.
  2. People and events don’t cause emotions but our thinking about them does—in different minds, a missed meeting, for instance, can mean different things that don’t feel the same.
  3. Feeling less angry about a matter means your thinking is softening up.
  4. If you can’t soften up in one leap, commit to baby steps.
  5. Think about life in the kindest ways you can or you’re punishing yourself otherwise.

Sartre said Hell is other people.

That’s true when we choose to be right over generous with our ideas about them. But…

Is it worth living in hell to be right about what you think?